In this inspiring conversation, author and educator Jani Kozlowski shares her personal and professional journey toward creating more inclusive early learning environments. Drawing from her own experience as a person with a disability—and as the parent of a child with a disability—Jani helps educators and families see that inclusion is not a place, but a culture of belonging.
She offers practical advice for educators who want to welcome every child, explains the importance of people-first language, and highlights how high expectations paired with support help all children grow and thrive.
Listeners will walk away with a renewed sense of confidence and compassion for creating classrooms where every child can fly.
Key Topics:
-
Jani’s personal story and how it shaped her work in early childhood inclusion
-
Why inclusion is a culture of belonging, not just a setting
-
People-first language and how words shape perceptions
-
How teachers and families can partner to support each child’s success
-
The benefits of inclusive classrooms for all children
-
Balancing high expectations with appropriate support
-
How educators can start building inclusive practices today
Episode Transcript
What follows is a lightly-edited transcript of the interview.
Emily Garman: Welcome to Early Childhood Chapters, the podcast from Gryphon House books, where we bring theory to practice for early childhood educators. I'm your host, Emily Garman, and today I'm joined by Jani Kozlowski: educator, consultant, and author of Every Child Can Fly and Empowering Your Child to Fly.
Jani draws from her own experiences as a professional, a parent, and as a person with a disability to show how inclusion isn't just a place, it's a culture of belonging. In our conversation, she shares stories and strategies that help educators and families work together so that every child, no matter their abilities, can truly take flight.
Jani, your own story is incredibly powerful. You've experienced disability as a professional, as a daughter, and as a parent also yourself. How have these different perspectives shaped your understanding of what true inclusion looks like?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Yeah. Well, thanks, Emily. Thanks for having me on. And I've been open about my own disability. Not my whole life, but pretty much in recent years. Because it is part of who I am. And it's really affected my journey as an early childhood educator and leader over time. And it really started out with my father because my father has the same disability that I do.
It's a form of dwarfism. So you can't tell on the video, but I am a little person, and my father was a little person as well. And I remember the way that people would react to him and some of the struggles that he went through. As a result of that, my dad was very accomplished. He was born in Argentina and immigrated to this country and became a doctor.
He was a psychiatrist. And so he achieved a lot and overcame a lot of obstacles. So I remember one time when I was a little girl and people would stare at me and at my dad. It was upsetting to me; the staring is hard. And my dad told me this story.
He said, well, Jani, if you imagine that the world is like a field of flowers, and if you're looking out in the world and all you see are blue flowers, when you see a pink flower, what do you do? You look. And so it gave me, a different perspective on the staring that I was really just a pink flower.
And, he really framed it for me. And in a very positive kind of way. And so it was a long process for me to come to terms with my disability and feel okay talking about it. When I became a mother, and my son also has a disability, I knew that it was important for me to be okay with talking about it as well, just for his own benefit.
And, over time, I learned from those experiences as a daughter and as a mom. And my own experiences in the world of early childhood, and really wanting to give that back to early childhood educators. And so I really wanted early childhood educators to feel confident and competent to serve every child, regardless of ability. And I find that stories are really powerful. So I used those stories from my own life to share that information in the book, Every Child Can Fly.
Emily Garman: It helps people really understand that you get where they're coming from, too. I think that's a big part of it, we remember stories, and we connect through stories.
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Yes. Yes, absolutely. Whenever I do talks, I can always tell that people are glued into me because sometimes people will take out their phones and start looking at them. But as soon as I tell a story, the phones go down and people are hooked.
Emily Garman: It's how we know!
Jani Kozlowski, MA: And it's a real lesson to all of us that that's how we connect as human beings. So powerful.
Emily Garman: So you've written two books for Gryphon House, one for educators and one for parents. So what inspired you to create these companion resources, and how do they work together to support inclusion from both sides of a child's world, the home and the school?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Yeah, yeah, that's a really good question. And I was so grateful to have the experience of writing the book for educators, Every Child Can Fly. And I wanted it to be my own story, because I have a lot of parenting stories in that book. And so I didn't let my husband read it while it was, going through the process.
So he never read the manuscript. I only let him read it once it was published in book form. And when he read it, his reaction was, this would have been so helpful for us when we were in the thick of it with our son Ricky. It's a compilation of all the things that I've learned in early childhood and also the world of early intervention and early childhood special education.
And so I thought, well, this might be something that families would benefit from as well. And so in that empowering your child to fly to book for families and I included family stories, I interviewed 15 families for the book. And so it's not just my story in there. It's also a theme of other families’ stories and photographs.
And so, my hope is that families can use the book Empowering Your Child to Fly as a resource that would help them, just like it would have helped me in that time of my life. In the early years of Ricky's development. And so the other thing that I think is important about it is that I want teachers to have a resource that they can share with families so that they can share, this is how we envision inclusion in our program, and it can help everyone get on the same page.
It can lead to better collaboration between families and educators. we might share teaching practices together. These are the things we're doing it school to support your child. These are the kinds of things you might want to try at home. Let's talk about it together. So I felt like it would really be a way for families and teachers, to work together.
And other early childhood professionals like early interventionists and early childhood special educators and occupational therapists, speech therapists, just a way for us to have kind of a common language, and to reflect together. So that was that.
Emily Garman: And ideally, all those people are working together to help each child succeed. Right? So this is really interesting to me, in Every Child can Fly; this this is your book for educators; You talk about that inclusion is not a place but a culture. Can you talk a little bit more about that and explain what does that mean for early childhood educators just in their in their practical day to day experience with children in the classroom?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Yeah, that's that's really important because I think about inclusion as this culture of caring, culture of kindness, and most importantly, a culture of belonging that every child is welcome here. We benefit from all kinds of strengths and challenges, too. We learn from challenges. And, the research shows that the number one barrier to inclusion are attitudes and beliefs.
So the mindset that we bring to teaching makes a huge impact on what goes on in our classrooms and even what we feel like as educators. We're capable of. And so, I've, I've worked with programs that start out with this mindset of, well, we're not set up for those children, we don't take those children, to every child is welcome here.
And we may not know all the answers. We as educators, we may not have a degree in special education. I don't have a degree in special education, but we're open to being okay with not knowing the answers and to finding them out together, to partnering with families to figure out what's best for the child. So just getting curious, supporting families, to work through challenges together.
And honestly, what is typical anyway? I don't think there is a typical child out there in the world. There's, we all face challenges as families and as teachers. And so that, that culture of belonging benefits us all because we don't know what the stumbling blocks are ahead, for our child or for us as educators in the classroom.
And so when we start with this culture of caring, kindness and belonging, that's a thread that kind of works through all of us. And supports all of us and the ups and downs of life. And PS, it’s also the law. So there's the Americans with Disabilities Act, requires that you cannot exclude children on the basis of disability if you benefit from federal funds.
And most childcare providers benefit from federal funds. If you are on the USDA food program, get reimbursement for the food that you provide in your program, you receive federal funds. And so that's the law that you must follow. ADA regulations.
Emily Garman: Do you find that most educators, in your experience, people you talk to, you want to be more inclusive? They want to be able to make every child feel welcome in their classroom, but they they don't know how to do it, or they just lack the tools or they they worry about saying or doing the wrong thing. So what advice would you give to educators who want to provide this inclusive environment, this inclusive, culture that you're talking about, but they they just don't know where to start, right?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Right. I think that's super common, Emily. I think, it's a mindset. And so that can become the barrier in and of itself. we feel like I don't have the skills. I don't have the education. Like you said, I don't know where to begin. That, I remind educators that families don't have a special education background either.
And they figure it out, with the support of professionals and with educators as well. And so now there isn't a magic pixie dust that suddenly makes you capable to handle every single situation that you face. So it's about partnering with families. It's about partnering with our systems of support, early intervention specialists and early childhood special educators.
Those resources can really support us to be able to be inclusive. And so when a child comes to you and they already have in place services, that plan can really be a launchpad for you to understand what is best for this child, what this child might need, but also who are the other resources that are part of the team in supporting that child.
Emily Garman: One of the things I remember from reading your story is about how when you were a senior in high school, you had this series of surgeries and you were wearing a halo. I mean, it was a really rough time for you, but you refused to use a handicapped parking permit for your car because you didn't want people to think you were handicapped. You just maybe you didn't feel comfortable with that phrase, or you didn't want to be identified in that way. And that makes me think about the question that I just asked about people not knowing what to say, and that that language. I know my myself, even, I don't want to say a wrong thing or an offensive thing. So can you elaborate on what you talk about in the books about people first language, moving past labels and really thinking about the language we use, and giving me some examples of that for our listeners, what does people first language sound like? How is that different? And I love that idea. People first language, it's the person that's the most important thing. Not an ever issue they have or condition.
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Right? A child is always a child first. The disability is only one part of who they are. And disability is not celebrated in our culture. It's just not, it is, a part of us that makes people marginalized. And so I think that's why, as a young adult, I didn't want to use the handicapped sign.
And it has taken me time years to see all of the beauty and amazing things that my disability brings to me as a person. And I didn't really have a choice. It's not going away. it is the first thing that people notice about me when they see me. Except on zoom, which is kind of cool, but that it's true.
People see the disability first, and so I can understand why, using phrases like “special needs child” or, these are the “down syndrome kids,” those kinds of labels that some people use. I can understand where that comes from, but it can be very hurtful. It's a child with a disability is a better way to put it than a special needs child or even a disabled child.
A child with spina bifida; putting the child first. That's what people first language is all about, that we use a child with a disability as opposed to the other way around. Now, given this, and this is a strong preference for me--But I also feel like it's important for young children in particular because of the fact that they're still figuring out who they are.
Preschoolers, they're still learning what the difference between a girl and a boy is and what different skin tones are all about. And, just differences in general are kind of the lesson of preschoolers. And so I know that there are a lot of people with autism who feel as though their autism is something that should be celebrated. It's something that makes them unique. It's a part of their personality that they wouldn't be them without their autism. And I totally get that, because I have, over time, come to feel that way about my own disability. Not Jani that walks with a limp, or Jani that's only four foot four inches tall? No, that's who Jani is.
So I totally get that. But I still cringe when I think about us calling a preschooler an “autistic child” because that preschooler is a preschooler first. And maybe over time they will grow to adopt their disability as part of their identity, and that would be a term that they would cherish. But I think until they have this really, until they've reached this cognitive level of being able to think about themselves in that way.
Preschoolers are not self-reflective. They don't have the cognitive skills yet. So until the child is old enough to claim their own identity, I really believe that adults should not force it upon them, and that we just are supportive about them completely, their their disability and every other part of that makes them who they are, and understanding that they won't be ready to assert their own identity until much later.
And I just personally, if I had had a teacher when I was in elementary school or even middle school or high school, if I had had a teacher say to the class that ‘Jani has dwarfism and isn't that great,’ I would have wanted to crawl under my desk because, as young children, we just want to fit in. We just want to belong, that belonging work comes again. So that's we've showed that with the language that we use as well. And also it's a personal thing. I share about my disability, but quite honestly it's not really anyone's business. Right. So I would hope that we would strive to see children as children first.
Emily Garman: What you said earlier, two comes back to this. What is typical, what is normal anyway? I mean, everyone has challenges and strengths and weaknesses, in so many different ways, whether they're visible or not. And to move from, typical to non neurotypical, to move from that to, they're just all children who are learning in different ways and, and process information in different ways.
And just the, the gifts that children of all kinds, from all different backgrounds, different children can bring so much to the table. And so I think that that's really nice, a great way to think about it. And that's something that that families can be part of too, obviously when they're bringing their child to school, helping the teacher, helping the other students see the strengths of their child.
And that's got to be so challenging as a parent, too, because just as you wanted to fit in as a child, you want your child to fit in and have good experiences. Maybe you could talk a little bit about your, you mentioned in your book, obviously families play a really critical role in the success here, and they have to work together with educators as true partners. And one of the things that you talked about is how you sort of wanted to pave the way for your son and make sure that he had a smooth experience and that he didn't have a hard time with anything. But your husband was kind of like, he's capable. Let's let him learn and do things that he can on his own so that he can develop resiliency.
And that's so hard. I'm a parent myself and just I do I want to smooth the way for my child and make her life easy. But that that isn't always helpful to her! So how do teachers and families work together to let that child grow? But also pave the way where it's needed?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Yeah. How do you do that balance? I don't know that I have it figured out. I was a mama bear. I am a mama bear. Very protective. Didn't want my son to struggle or suffer in any way. I think that's just an instinct. But it isn't always the best thing. And, one of the other things about disability that's different from other types of, so-called identities that are part of who we are, is that disability can be situational and disability can be temporary. So, I think about my own son who has ADHD and sensory processing disorder. The challenges that he faced as a preschooler are pretty much non-existent for him as an adult.
They are different challenges now, but that the things that made up his ADHD is very different in how it plays out now that he's a young adult in the workforce. So families have such an important role in the way they frame their child's disability, the way they respond to their child's disability and what they can or can't do.
I remember not so long ago, I was traveling with my mom, and it was time to put our luggage into the back of the car. And, she's five foot ten and I'm four foot four. And so she's just like, automatically went to grab my suitcase and put it in the back of the car. And I had such a reaction to that.
I was like, I can put my suitcase in the back of the car. But from her perspective, it looked like, the suitcase is almost as big as you, Jani, let me do this, let me help you. But it was a good reminder to me about why children should be given this opportunity to first try, and the way that we can do this together, as with families and, and teachers, is provide affirmations.
First of all, we families really do need support and affirmation to know you're doing a good job, mom. That can go a long way. Teachers need that, too. families can say, I'm so impressed with you as a teacher. I appreciate you, all of those things. But we can also think about the ways that the child is practicing new skills.
Then how can we set up situations so the child is practicing the skills in school, but then also at home. And then we come together, we talk about what's working, what isn't working. So that's super important, and a way to connect.
Emily Garman: I think that goes hand in hand with what you talked about in the book with your husband, high expectations, having high expectations of a child while still providing the supports that they need to succeed. And that's a delicate balance, too.
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Yes, yes, yes. Lately, in school, I remember we studied Lev Vygotsky, and the zone of proximal development. That's for every child. You kind of give just enough support so that then they're able to do it on their own. I think about an infant that if an infant is learning to reach and to grasp, we hold the spoon out just enough so that then the infant can reach and grasp the spoon on their own.
And it's a concept that carries on throughout. And one of the moms that I interviewed for the family's book, Patricia Reedy, she has a daughter named Catherine. And the way she put it is that whenever, service professional would say to her, Can Catherine do this? Can Catherine do that? Her response was always, I don't know. Let's try it. Let's see. So just avoiding this assumption creates, gives the child that chance to figure out for themselves what they're capable for, because when we don't, we make assumptions that they can't do it based on X, Y, or Z and they can internalize that. And so they might internalize a sense of, I'm not capable.
And I think about how it is with math and a lot of early childhood educators; I've heard from so many educators of, oh, I can't do math. And I think, well, what was it like when you were learning math? Was it was it hard at first and then you didn't process because it was okay to say, I'm not good at math, or was there some other thing that happened that kind of made you internalize that sense of, I'm not good at it? So that's just an example of how you might think about it when you imagine what a child's perspective is on the high expectations and giving them a chance to grow and to show what they're capable of.
Emily Garman: The next thing I want to ask, I want to be really careful how I phrase this, because when I was growing up, things were really different. And the children with, they called them “learning disabilities” were very much separated from typically developing children. And the idea was that they shouldn't be together, because the teachers would spend have to spend more time or more resources with those children who needed more attention and more help.
And that would take away from the “normal” kids. And I'm saying that with heavy quotations around it. And now we're seeing an attitude in classrooms where the benefits of everybody learning together and being together in classrooms benefits everyone. It doesn't just benefit children with disabilities or learning differences, it benefits typically development children as well.
And that's such a shift to think about, and also the way that families of children of all abilities talk about other children and creating that sense of belonging that will last the lifetime of children who are experiencing school in this way versus the way that I grew up. And so I'm curious, the question there is, how can these more inclusive learning environments and the practices that you're talking about make learning, make school better for everybody, for every child?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Oh, and it's so true. It does. And the research supports that. We have decades of research on inclusion. In early childhood in particular. And we know from the research that children with disabilities, when they're in an inclusive setting, have improved developmental outcomes, improved social skills, all across the domains of development.
But what's really cool is that we see those same gains in all of the children in the classroom, we see those improved developmental outcomes in the children that don't have an IEP. We see, greater levels of empathy. The social outcomes are improved ability to make friends as pure relationships.
And it's if you think about it, it makes a lot of sense because when you teach something, you really know it. When you're showing somebody how to do something, it confirms it in yourself. So like we see younger siblings learn how to read much more quickly because they have an older sibling that's reading to them and showing them how.
And so the same is true in preschool that when you're learning about how to sound out letters or how to throw a ball, all of all of the different skills that we're learning in early childhood, that when you have a chance to learn it and then show someone else how to do it and support them, that can be a real growth experience for them as well. So it really does benefit every child.
Emily Garman: So we're seeing more changes. We're seeing more changes towards inclusivity. I think that's it as a whole. We're seeing that in early childhood. What are some really positive things that you've seen change over the years, just that you've been practicing and that you've been working in this area and doing this work? What do you see that's changed that's positive? And what do you feel like still needs to happen?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Yeah, it's rare now that I hear about programs saying “we don't take those children.” I mean that that really is not as prevalent as it might have once been. We’ve come a long way as a culture in that it used to be that children with disabilities were thought to need to be institutionalized.
But we do have a long way to go. It's not always the case for children with intellectual disabilities like you spoke about. And we have found that, one of the things that states, local communities and states submit to the federal government is data about where children with an FSP or an IEP, where they receive their services and even now, less than half of preschoolers receive their services in an inclusive setting, like child care or Headstart or state pre-K.
Over half are in a separate class or a separate school or residential facility. So, we've come a long way, but we're not moving the needle on inclusion. And then where children are served so that that data has been the case for over 20 years. So we do still have a long way to go with just this practical application of inclusion, which when I talk about inclusion, that's what I mean about receiving their services in the place they would be if they didn't have a disability, where would this child be if they didn't have a disability?
Oh, it's child care. Okay, well, then that's where they're going to receive the support. That's where maybe an occupational therapist comes in and provides support. Maybe a speech language pathologist comes in, talks with a teacher, and they figure out together the best way, to approach the situation and what's going to work best for this child. So it's such a win win. And it's it's such an area that we need to change. Because that data really has not changed in over 20 years.
Emily Garman: Is teacher education changing? Our teachers, when they're going through their training to become teachers, are they getting more information about children with disabilities and inclusive classrooms? Do you see that changing?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: I know that there are a lot more blended early childhood programs than there used to be. there used to be a real focus on early childhood. Special education is like a degree, and now teachers might get an early childhood degree with a concentration in special education or, additional classes, but they, higher ed has really worked hard to blend those programs because the child is a child first.
And honestly, so many of the strategies that we use in early childhood special education are just good practices. They benefit every child. So yeah, I have seen some change there as well. But it's hard, it's a huge part of our system that we, we have these kind of separations. So it's going to take some time.
Emily Garman: The metaphor that you use that carries through both of your books, this idea that every child can fly is so powerful and so hopeful. I love it. What does the idea of flying mean to you? It probably means a few different things. And how can all of us adults, teachers, parents and people who care for children help every child take flight in their own way?
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Yeah, and honestly, that title came from an experience I had where I saw this baby bird get snatched out of a nest by a hawk, and it wiggled and cried out and was too much trouble. And the hawk dropped the baby bird. And there was this whole thing that happened with the baby bird on the on in the grass.
And mama bird came and tried to help, but she was like, I can't put you on my back and bring me back to the nest. And I watched all of this on my back porch, and that baby bird flew! And it was not really a typical kind of fly. It was a really wobbly fly. Kind of a pitiful fly.
Not like you normally see other birds fly, but that baby bird flew. And I told that story to some early childhood friends and they were like, that's just like us, we're the ones that are down there on the ground. We, those baby birds come to our classroom in all different kinds of ways. Some come in a supported way. Some come in kind of a traumatic way. Different abilities. And strengths. And eventually they all learn how to fly. And it might not be in the same way as other birds or in the same time frame, but they learn how to fly in their own time. And so it became this metaphor, for me and, I, I feel like when we think about children, and especially in the preschool years now, they are at this really vulnerable state and the families are at a very vulnerable state as well, because it's the beginning of school.
And so they are figuring things out in the most pure way in early childhood. And so if we have this frame, it's expecting competence, giving children a chance to try new things again and again that we come to this work with a sense of curiosity and get creative to find out the supports that are needed.
We can create this environment so that every child has this potential, to learn and grow and fly, and that's really what inclusion is all about, that every child belongs, every child has strengths, every child can fly. Just reaching our own best potential and getting a sense of what we're confident of what our skills are, what our preferences are, what our strengths are, and how am I going to give that back to the world? That's really what it's all about.
Emily Garman: Thank you. Jani, it's been real pleasure to have you here today with us on Early Childhood Chapters.
Jani Kozlowski, MA: Thanks for the opportunity, Emily. It was great talking with you.
Emily Garman: That's it for this episode of Early Childhood Chapters. A huge thank you to Jani Kozlowski for sharing her insight and her powerful personal story.
You can learn more in her Gryphon House books, Every Child Can Fly and Empowering Your Child to Fly. Both are available now. If you enjoyed today's episode, please follow or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts and leave us a review to help other educators and families find our show. Thanks for listening.
